From: KEYBND@aol.com KEYBND@aol.com
Sent: Monday, June 17, 2002 6:09 PM
To: Info@trebach.org
Subject: Straight

Dear Mr. Trebach,

I just read the St. Petersburg Times' article "In the Middle of a Nightmare". Unfortunately, I saw it a week too late. I would have love to attended. I have been trying to figure out for years how to get the victims of this program together and DO something about what was done to us and to keep it from happening again. Until I read that article, I thought that I was the only one who still carried the anger and outrage around with me. I was in the Pinellas Straight at the same time as Richard Bradbury, Samantha Monroe, and Chris Tyler. I was 14. I also, think that the Bradbury's were one of my "host families". They had an albino skunk!

My mother and I fought a lot when I was 14. I had always been on my own (not in a bad way-she just had to work) taking care of myself before and after school and then when I turned 13 she wanted to rein me in. So we had a lot of conflict but not because of drugs. Someone convinced her that must be it

When I was tricked into going to straight, I didn't even do drugs. I had tried pot and hash once but didn't like it. I did smoke cigarrettes though. My mom told me we were going somewhere (the mall or something) and ended up going to straight for an "evaluation". Miller Newton lifted my eyelids and looked around my eyeballs and said that I had been doing cocaine, speed, ludes, pot, hash.etc...etc.. I admitted to trying pot and hash, and vehemently denied the other accusations but they had my mother convinced I was lying. Using all of his psychological bullshit-such as of course they'll deny it..blah blah blah. I was immediately taken into another room and strip searched-they looked at my private areas! I was14 years old and had not committed any crime and was being violated by these grotesque lying people.

They carried me around by my belt buckle-watched me pee, and more-it's worse for a girl. At 14, a girl or boy, is just getting used to the changes in their bodies and are embarrassed by them. They have a hard enough time dealing with that without strangers looking at every orifice and every act.

They made me sit for at least 12 hours a day without being allowed to go to the bathroom (some peed themselves and then got in trouble for it), excercise with at least 15 other girls in a room no bigger than a bathroom to the point of passing out. And the smell! Yuk! I never want to hear the song "Oh What a Beautiful Morning" again in my whole life.

When I refused to talk in "Rap" I was taken to the timeout room-several times. I had nothing to tell. They wanted us to talk about masturbating and things like that. At that point in my life-I had never done that-they didn't believe me. I think there was just some pervert wanting to hear that stuff. I'll never forget this girl talking about putting jelly on herself and letting her cat lick it off-telling this (true or not) in front of a hundred strangers! Crying all the while.

And I also refused to shake my arm about like a retard. They didn't like that either.

I ran away with another girl during 1st Phase. I can't remember so many of the names. Host parents have to revamp their houses so that windows can't be opened and locks can't be broken. We stole the key to the bedroom door, took $20.00 and a pack of cigarrettes, and the house keys from her mom's purse and locked the deadbolt from the outside. We did leave the keys in the door and I later mailed the $20.00 back to her. We didn't want to hurt them-just needed to escape.

We hitchhiked to Georgia via truck drivers. One truck driver tried touching my friend while she was asleep and I hit him. He didn't do anything else Thank God. We got caught sleeping in a field under a cardboard box with a box of doughnuts! The police were good to us. Her parents arrived first to pick her up and withdrew her from Straight. My mom arrived and we went for Pizza-I told her everything that was happening and she believed me-until we got back to straight.

They apparently had told my mother that I would make up all sorts of stories to get her to take me out of the program but that I shouldn't be believed. After all, I was a druggie. I was in the waiting room and Dr. Miller (Newton)-he was called Dr. Miller came out with two 4th Phasers to get me. I refused and grabbed onto the handles of the chair. He personally, grabbed me by the hair and proceeded to yank me out of the chair while telling my mother to leave. I put up a pretty good fight-but the hair pulling gets to you after a while-we were no less than cattle and dollars to him.

At the next "Rap" I again refused to speak. It was an "Open Meeting" night when the parents could come to see you. They had five "elder" girls take me into the timeout room-a large closet-and get me to confess that I had

fucked one of the truck drivers-their words. I hadn't. Wouldn't say I did.Then they started pushing me around, pulling out my hair clips, saying "oh, you think you're cute,etc.etc." pushing me against the wall. I said I didn't do what the likes of them would do-boy did that piss them off! This went on and on. They said that I couldn't see my mom until I admitted what I did and told her. So, finally, I gave in and told them what they wanted to hear. I had to tell this lie to my mom. It has taken 20 years of feeling shame that my mom thought that I would actually do something like that and I finally know that she knows I was lying to get them to backoff.

I smartened up after that. I knew I had to get to 2nd Phase so I could go home. I started making up all kinds of stories that I was repentent for, shaking my arm about like a retard, taking my cues from people further along in the program. The whole while staring at the open door of the warehouse (no AC) planning my escape to the trailer park next door. Trying to figure out how to overpower the big guy at the door and not get tackled by the hundred behind me. I had a girl that sat next to me that I think was slightly retarded (not being mean) because she would sit there with her bottom lip filling up with spit and running over-and it smelled bad! They were especially mean to her. She couldn't help it.There was another boy-I think Michael-not sure of the name-who everyday asked to be let out. He was 18. They had no more right to keep him. They kept telling him that is paperwork was in file 13. I guess as lon g as his parents were willing to pay they'd break the law.

I continued confessing all of my sins-all of them that I could think up until I finally got to second phase. YIPPEE.. I got in touch with my best friend (you are not supposed to want to know any of your old friends) and ran away again. It took three weeks for them to catch me. My mom did not put me back in. But they wanted the rest of their money.

Nancy Reagan visited while I was there. The Reagan's, other political supporters and parents were duped by the Sembler's and Miller Newton. To think that the Sembler's are still allowed to be a part of any treatment program is appalling! People like that don't change their nature-they just learn to hide it better. What's even worse is that he is a representative of the American people in Italy. They should all be in jail.

If any parent treated their children the way that these people treated us-they would be in jail for child abuse and worse.

I don't think that any of us will get over this until we have a chance to face our attackers and get some justice-even if it's just political. Is there a way for us to file a class action suit against them personally?

I cannot be in confined places-especially crowds, don't sleep well, it took me a year and 1/2 of living with my Aunt and Uncle afterward to quit having nightmares, have a total disregard for authority, and am completely paranoid about "professionals" real intentions, and still feel like I have to justify my existence. I'm tired of that.

I have a son who is 17. We have had our ups and downs-but never, never would I turn his or my problems over to "professionals" who would demean him, abuse him, make him think he is a bad or evil person. I believe that he has probably tried things, just as I did.

The only positive thing that I got from Straight was to know to trust my son and even that has been hard sometimes because of what I was taught, and not listen to "professionals" who have no idea who he is. I know when he is lying to me or when he has tried something. We talk openly most of the time. The hardest age was fifteen and half way through sixteen. But we got through it and I hope that what I am seeing is a boy and mom who survived the tough teen years-not shipped off because we couldn't handle it.

In the 80's all teen problems were contributed to drugs-there was major drug "paranoia" which comes from politicians and the media. I would like to help stop this from continuing

I understand that there are some teens that truly do need help outside of their families, but not that many. The parents need help understanding that "authorities" are not always the answer to their problems. They need to have a little faith in themselves to handle the crisis' that happen as a child grows older in this day and age and treat their child as a contemporary not a lesser being to be completely controlled. Also, not all children are exactly the same, just as adults are not. In fact, children are probably more diverse because they have not been exposed to the influence of adulthood. For any "professional" or "authority" to claim that they understand or know more about your child is ludicrous-unless they have spent more time with them. They are not one-dimensional-they are multi-dimensional. Just because they have a bad period does not mean they are bad. Just as we are not.

I only forgave my mom after I went through a tough time with my son and understood what being at "Wit's End" meant. That's when you need family support-not "God Wannabes" who get the support of the Whitehouse-and have no idea what children are about.

When the going got tough the weak sent them to Straight.

Then they learned better.

Thank you,
Tracy C. Garrett
115 14th Avenue
Indian Rocks Beach, FL 33785
(727)517-8587